Cleaning van for pesach

by Avrumi Friedman

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Posted on Thursday, 19 March 2026

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Cleaning your van for Pesach is a special kind of spiritual journey.

You start off motivated like:

“Okay, we’re just getting rid of a few crumbs.”

Twenty minutes later you’re in the third row seat crevice, uncovering what can only be described as… pre-Matza Era civilization.

You find:

* 3 petrified French fries

* A granola bar that expired during the Second Temple

* And one mysterious sticky substance that’s definitely ??? but also possibly sentient

At some point you’re not even cleaning anymore—you’re doing archaeology.

“Ah yes, this layer is from the 2022 road trip… a strong Goldfish period.”

And the worst part?

Every time you think you’re done, you open one more compartment.

Boom.

A full challah roll just staring back at you like:

“You really thought you finished?”

By the end, you’re sitting on the driveway, covered in crumbs, questioning your life choices, whispering:

“Next year… we sell the van.”

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